House Building-A Love/Hate Relationship

After what seems like an eternity (nearly 4 years, same thing!) of living in a rental, it looks like we are going to be moving into a new house in 24 days! Although, looking at today's pics of their progress, I am doubtful that they can really assemble my beautiful home in 24 short days. I am excited, but reservedly so. After 4 years of complete and utter frustration, can it really be that something wonderful is about to happen? Like so many people who lost everything when the housing market crashed, we have spent the last four years trying to rebuild our abysmal credit. My husband and I had to give up our dream home in a short sale, negotiate with creditors to avoid bankruptcy, and try to hang in there and keep our bank account and marriage afloat through a long stretch of unemployment, school and personal stresses. It has been emotionally and physically draining. And it really felt like it was going to last forever. I guess at this point, the underwriter could still look at our loan package and deny us for some odd reason. That would be par for the course we have been on, but I am clinging to the glimmers of hope given us by the loan officer and the builder that, yes, this can be done. In sum, I love this house and am beyond excited that it could actually be mine. On the other hand, I hate the process-the loan application and approval process is excruciatingly slow and uncertain-absolutely nerve wracking. The packing, the timing, the possibility of someone missing a deadline and us being out of a home as of July 31. So many variables. Hard for a "planner" like me. My husband and I never fight, but the emotional strain of all of this has pushed us to the brink. Almost to the point that it would be easier to walk away from the house. But it is the smart thing to do-build equity, plan a future, put down new roots. Start over. Lord knows we need a fresh start. If God chooses to bless us with this unexpected miracle, I will blogging the complete journey of decorating and furnishing this beautiful house and I hope you'll watch. I can smell the fresh paint already!